Sunday, August 24, 2008

Stupid hippies and their stupid patchouli.

My next door neighbor has his apartment up for sale. This is good news because A) I like new blood and B) he's a smoker and it stinks up the hallway like nobody's business. Of course, a new neighbor could be worse and really, he isn't a bad neighbor, but I like to roll the dice every now and again.

HOWEVER.

He's having an open house today and the scent they chose to de-cigarette his apartment?

Patchouli.

MY LEAST FAVORITE SCENT EVER and now it's funking up my hallway.

Okay maybe not my LEAST, because cumin, garbage, poo, and morning breath still exist in the world, but I'd be willing to say that patchouli is in the top three on my list of scents that people seem to enjoy, even though they stink.

The other two?

Paperwhites and old lady scented dog shampoo/drugstore perfume. Paperwhites smell like cat pee and when I went Googling for a picture of them for you Internet, I kept finding descriptions of them as "sweet smelling." Gross.

And the old lady scented dog shampoo/drugstore perfume? I don't know what the hell it's called, but it should be outlawed. Alls I know is that when my sweet baby Dave comes back from getting his butt hair trimmed, he stinks like old lady.

AND, I'm thinking that this blog is getting much more tl;dr than the old one so here's a picture of the most handsome dog in the world:

3 comments:

Jordan said...

haha

Thank you, Urban Dictionary.

Love Dave!

xoxo

Esbee said...

I had to look up tl;dr too! And I disagree. pl;dr (perfect length did read). But I will never discourage you from posting Dave pics.

Patchouli is GROSS. I can imagine using it for anything but a repellent. Unless you were selling a place in Berkeley. Maybe they are only putting up flyers in Whole Foods.

p.s. The lady that lives downstairs from me smokes and I can smell it sometimes in my place. It's gross and I worry about her burning the building down.

Anonymous said...

I think Gardenia smells like old lady. My mom is NOT very old lady, and she still uses Gardenia-scented stuff. However, when she uses it, she points out that she knows I think it smells like old lady. I think that's her way of acknowledging the fact but excusing herself from being considered an old lady.

I had never seen tl;dr (or is it heard?). All of my LJ posts are tl;dr.